Lilly was right, I was wrong. Brown lipstick is amazing and makes you look like a boss. In the past few month I have accumulated a comprehensive collection, for every look and every pricepoint (unless you are rich, in which case, no).
Bourjois Rouge Edition Velvet in Nudeist is a great beginners brown, mostly because it is primarily pink. It stays on for ages and ages without drying out the lips and sort of draws attention to your lips without adding any colourfulness. Hot top: mixing this with more full on browns makes a nice pinky-brown which is more longlasting.
Maybelline Superstay 14hr in Beige for Good is a nice nude-ish brown, which again pulls focus to the lips without being a "bold lip" which can sometimes look a bit try-hard. This has a bit of a funny texture and goes from slippy to very very dry quite quickly so topping up is a bit of a bummer. However if you apply and let it dry without faffing with it, it will last v well.
ELF Essentials Lipstick in Fantasy is a very basic, browny pinky, slippy and non-drying formula lipstick. Because of this it isn't the most long lasting, but because it's cheap you can just carry it with you and shove some more on.
Laval Lipstick in Mink has a great brown with a hint of purple colour. Although it looks similar, it is actually more cool-toned than the ELF lipstick. This is the cheapest of the bunch and for the price is amazing, but smells like melted plastic.
Stargazer Matte Lipstick in 208 is a really great dark chocolatey brown. It is matte and very longlasting without being drying. It has a sort of waxy texture which sounds unpleasant but I promise it isn't. I really love this to get the look of a "dark lip" but again without introducing any colour to an outfit.
But it is in Topshop Lipstick in Boardroom that I have found my best brown. It is very cool toned and purpley, and makes you look like a badass corpse. It is long-lasting, non-drying and everything I have ever wanted in my brown lipstick quest.
Here they all are "swatched" in the same order, because I am very professional and a good blogger. However, because it is winter in England, it gets dark at about ten to three, so the lighting isn't the best, and for that I can only apologise.